Thoughtful Thursday

#1 is in time out right now. For probably the 12th time today. Obedience is tough when you're 3. And 26. Over the past four years God his chosen to prune us as a family with one major "crisis" a year. And a few weeks short of 2009, He's pruning us again. Each time He proves faithful and loving. But it's hard to see the blessings to come when you're stuck in the mud of your circumstances. It's hard to obey and be faithful right now when all I want to do is scream and beg God to give us a break!!

In my Beth Moore study this fall we had a whole chapter on pruning. We discussed how God can prune us through his word, and sometimes when that doesn't get through our thick vines He uses trial and circumstances. Ironically, Hubby and I were discussing this just a few days ago. I have all of this knowledge, and I know that the Bible says he always has a plan for us and never gives us more than we can handle. But there are days, like today, I just want to give up. Throw in the towel and fix our problem myself. I like control. I'm a little Type-A. (And I wonder why God prunes me in this area of giving control over to Him?!! Hello!!!).

I've been such a brat to God in the past 24 hours, constantly crying out to him how frustrated and angry I am. It's so hard for me to look at the big picture!! Each time I feel like this I'm reminded of the things He's safely guided us through in the past few years. Here are a few stories which testify to His faithfulness. For encouragement to me (and you, oh imaginary internet friends...)

1. Being 8 months pregnant and getting surprise that Hubby didn't actually complete his degree, couldn't enroll in credentialing as planned and was about to get fired from his intern teaching position because the district thought he was trying to con them. Oh, and we had both already quit our other jobs. How God showed up: Hubby got an emergency credential, tested out of the class he didn't pass, got his degree posted to transcripts and got to skip a quarter of credentialing so he got to be home more with me and our newborn.
2. Being so broke we had literally $1 in our checking account. Stepping out in faith that God would provide. God showed us his faithfulness through a blessing of $1000. Way more than we needed to get us to the next paycheck.
3. Surprise pregnancy and PPD. Ava Joy is such a sweet blessing and there's not a day that passes that I don't praise God for this precious girl. God showed up through sweet friends helping me out when I was overwhelmed and crazy. My dear friend Shea came up from San Diego every single Monday for a year to help me with my girls and give me a little break.
4. While pregnant with Ava Joy my AFP test came back positive for Down Syndrome. Ava is a completely healthy and "normal" girl. Praise Jesus.
5. Hubby is almost done credentialing and the state makes huge budget cuts to education (thanks Governator!!). Not sure if Hubby will get rehired. Most districts are letting go all teachers with 3 years or less teaching experience. Hubby's district found other ways to cut back, giving us another contract and a raise.

Just writing these down have been good for my heart. #1's still in T.O., and quiet. What a blessing to have this 10minutes to remind myself that everything will be okay. We'll be okay, we'll all be alive and the world will keep turning. He is sovreign